Why Did My Mourning Become a Joke 

We have all come face-to-face with loss.
Loss that gives birth to mourning.
For those fighting infertility, mourning comes every month.

The turmoil of hoping, trying,
only to mourn again and again

all while being mocked, laughed at.
As if infertility is a joke.
As if disability is comedy.

But why has my disability become a laughing matter?

The ability to give birth is no different
from the ability to breathe.
It is not earned. It is given.
So why judge those who were not given this gift?

Those who ran out of breath and life
wished for more time.
Those struggling with infertility
wish for children.
Neither chose their pain.

Some are born with disabilities,
others became disabled through sickness or accidents.
Infertility is the same
unwanted, unchosen,
yet carried with silent grief.

We show compassion to the disabled.
We mourn the dead.
We value life.
So why not extend the same understanding
to the infertile?

They mourn constantly.
They hide their pain.
They endure mockery,
yet carry a weight unseen.

Let us remember:
just as life deserves dignity,
so does the silent suffering
of those who cannot give life.

So, I ask again:
Why did my mourning become a joke?

Poem Description

Loss takes many forms: death, disability, or infertility. Beyond medicine, it is monthly mourning and silent grief. Yet, instead of compassion, many endure mockery while quietly carrying their struggle.

Infertility is not failure. It is not shame. It is not comedy. It is a wound that bleeds in silence, a grief that renews itself month after month. Those who carry it do not need mockery, they need compassion. Just as we honor the dead, just as we care for the disabled, let us also respect the hidden pain of the infertile. Behind every smile may be a womb that weeps, and a heart that longs to be understood. To those struggling with infertility, you are more than your womb, more than your grief, your life has meaning beyond what others may see. Look beyond what you don’t have.