WHAT IS CONSENT?
Agreement to take part in a sexual activity: agreed by choice, with the freedom and ability to make this choice.
WHEN HAS SOMEONE NOT GIVEN CONSENT?
When they have not said yes, or if drunk, drugged, threatened, sleeping, or they are too young.
WHAT IS RAPE?
ARE THERE ANY TIME YOU DO NOT NEED CONSENT?
WHY IS CONSENT IMPORTANT?
For many reasons: rape is a crime, consent makes sex safe and fun, it makes you more comfortable, it is kind to make sure the other person wants the same thing as you, it avoids any misunderstandings later.
WHO IS CONSENT IMPORTANT TO?
Everyone! Women and men both need to consent to sex and have consent from the other person.
MYTHS ABOUT RAPE
-You do not need consent if you are married.
WRONG! Rape can happen in a marriage, you must always have consent from any sexual partner.
-You do not need consent from a prostitute.
WRONG! Just because prostitutes get paid for sex does not mean they do not have the right to refuse sex with someone. Sex without consent is rape no matter who the person is or the choices they make.
-You do not need consent if you have already had sex with someone.
WRONG! You need consent every time you have sex.
-Men can’t be raped.
WRONG! Anyone can be raped.
-Rape only happens between strangers.
WRONG! Most people are raped by someone they know.
-Women’s clothes and the way they act/behave mean they are to blame.
WRONG! Anyone can be raped regardless of their choices. The rapist is always to blame.
-If the victim did not fight back, it was not rape.
WRONG! Often people are scared for their life whilst being raped and so cooperate to save themselves. It may be so shocking and scary that they cannot move.
-If the victim does not report the rape immediately it is not rape.
WRONG! The victim may be scared to report the crime. They may wrongly think what happened is not a crime. They might think that they will not be believed. They may not want to talk about the horrible experience. Often victims can be blamed and fear what people will think. It may take time to build up courage to tell someone, but it is never too late.
ADVICE ABOUT CONSENT
Consent is a personal thing; find a good way of letting someone know you consent, and a way of finding out if they consent too. You must make sure you know your partner is consenting. Never assume your partner has consented without checking. If you are not sure ask them. If your partner is drunk or on drugs then you should not have sex as they cannot consent.